An Awakening

Today as i looked upon my face in the mirror i realized that although i am still young time has flown by me so quickly. I see the signs of age slowly creeping up upon my face and the affects of pulling all nighters, stress, tears, joy, smiles, to much partying, fights, experiencing love in its truest of forms, and knowing the true dept of heartaches. Its rather wicked how you wake up and you realized that you are at a lost for how you got to where you are, and how you look around not knowing exactly when you took the wrong fork in the road or when you lost track of what you "were" supposed to be doing. And at the same time i really can not complain. For although life has an ugly way of unraveling and often times is an unpleasant experience I am glad for every scar, smile, wrinkle,and memory i obtained. And the ever elusive feeling of happiness drives you forward, giving you hope that one day you will reach the end of that long road and hold happiness in your arms victorious. Its like flirting with death. Some only feel alive when they put themselves inches from it, while the pursuit of happiness flirts with you, giving you moments of unending joy and leaving you feeling cold and lonely like waking up from a night of too much drinking and searching for the familiar smiles of those you had shared cheers with.

I am putting miles on my body, mind and soul and often times i feel that ill break down at any moment, however my body refuses to give up, my mind drives me forward and my soul is full of hope.I hope i will stand one day victorious with happiness in my arms, love in my heart and peace of mind but to be honest its become harder to find a reason to keep pushing foward with each passing day pulling me deeper down into the dark. The light is somewhere up there but im not sure i can keep clawing my way out everytime i fall. what is this darkness? what is light? what secrets do my own eyes hide from me. i look out and face life, my own adventure, my own story written not words but with each day i live.



a new awakening awaits...